A father for everyone

This is an advance blog for Father's Day on Sunday which is a tribute for my father. I will make another tribute for my husband later. Actually, I have published this in my old blog which is gone now. I just added a picture of him together with my mom and their first two grandchildren.

After my father's death, memories about him spontaneously came vividly on my mind.....well, during the time of my father's death or rather during the mass at the burial, I was pressured by thinking of something to say about my father....it was unthinkable during that time. I can remember my eldest sister not saying anything when she was called. It should be understandable-imagine being so tired for days, talking to people, smiling even and working at the same time, there was not even a time to grieve....it was only after some days that I get to cry and think about him, and for sure it was also the same case with my siblings. I also presumed that almost everyone that attended the funeral know something or more about my father. although it was us, his children who have known him very well can really say who he was and yet, i know that each one of us have experienced him differently and have different opinions about him... there was a joke in our family who is the favorite child of my father--there was always a choice between my elder siblings.... but what they didn't know is that, I was the favorite child of my father....although in the late years of his life, he would call me Etta(my youngest sister's name)...he he he kidding aside, I have always felt that I was a favorite. My father allowed me to spread my wings and fly... maybe because he knows that i have guts. I know that of all his children, I was the most open about my feelings or my anger. I cannot say that I am always right when I fight or stand for what I feel, but it was hard for me to be silent....I also remembered that I would drink a bottle of beer with him when he was alone and watching tv(that was during the time I thought beer can make me fat only to realized that it will do in the places you don't want them to be)There was also some instances I would travel in some far places and it was only the night before i was leaving that I would tell my parents....ohhh i am going to some place in the south(for example). I did not even gave them a chance to say why or no...and yet they let me be...

I don't know if my siblings have known but I sometimes write letters to my father especially when we have big problems. One time, I was hurting so much and for my mother( during that time she have hurt my mother's feelings)that I have written him a letter. I have put it in the table in the sala and put his name on it one day. It was like a soap opera actually. I even hide when I saw that he was about to read it already. I saw he has tears in his eyes after reading it and then he left right away. I ran and followed him in the street shouting and asking about his answer and all, but he never did answer my question. there was a time that i did not spoke to him for one year, but my father, I realized during that time was a sweet person. He showed me how much he cares through my mother. He knows I was hurting and he respected my silence. I also remembered during one of our family meetings...it was a humbling experience for my father to say sorry to my eldest sister because he asked her to stop finishing her course and just help in the business. (my sister was already in her third year of accounting.) I realized how he really regret that one. There are....lots and lots of things I remember about him that makes me happy having him as a father. Of course, there were few sad moments when we disagreed on some things. It makes me smile everytime I remember our family conversations at the dinner table, where all of us-with my 6 other siblings and parents would end up laughing and talking at the same time, and can you guess what we are talking during one of those dinners? You will think we are gossiping but actually we are just talking about some developments in a pilipino or american tv series. Ang babaw no?